Any major life change, even a pleasant one, brings new challenges. Worries about the future, questioning if you made the right choice, or missing your old life can unsettle even the most resilient individuals. Whether it’s moving to a new city, changing jobs, or ending a relationship, these transitions can spark an internal revolution, pushing you to adapt to new realities. Discover how to face these events with minimal psychological impact, especially those related to growing up, in our feature on queenska.com.
Who is Maria Kourounis?
Maria Kourounis is a licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist serving clients in Queens and throughout New York City. She holds a Bachelor of Arts from Hunter College and a Master of Social Work from Fordham University, both located in New York. Additionally, Kourounis is certified as a school social worker by the State University of New York’s Department of Education and is trained in cognitive-behavioral therapy.
Kourounis’s deep empathy allows her to help patients with issues she has personally experienced. Her work closely aligns with her own life, giving her a unique understanding of her clients’ struggles. She specializes in helping individuals manage anxiety, depression, and trauma. Moreover, she provides support for stress and major life changes and is one of the few psychotherapists in New York specializing in helping women suffering from intimacy-related issues due to anxiety, trauma, or health concerns. Her therapeutic approaches include cognitive-behavioral, psychodynamic, interpersonal therapy, trauma therapy, and strength-based therapy.
Techniques to Manage Emotions
Life changes bring a wealth of new challenges and, more importantly, emotional upheaval, requiring a profound inner shift in one’s life and identity. Moving to a new city or even a new country, for instance, involves not only packing belongings and finding a new home but also saying goodbye to friends and family, embracing new cultural norms, and finding your place in a new community.
Managing emotional stress can be extremely challenging. Psychotherapy is therefore recommended. Maria Kourounis uses psychodynamic, interpersonal, and strength-based approaches, along with evidence-based counseling techniques. Each therapeutic method is designed to help clients master coping skills, regulate emotions, and manage stress.
Mindfulness can help you become aware of your thoughts, feelings, and emotions without judgment. This approach is complemented by cognitive-behavioral therapy, which helps patients examine their perception of reality and adjust their behavior accordingly. Similar to this is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which encourages psychological flexibility and adaptability. As the name suggests, ACT focuses on accepting one’s struggles and challenges and taking responsibility for one’s life to foster positive change. By working with a therapist, individuals can learn healthy communication, fully process grief, and handle life’s challenges with resilience.
Empty Nest Syndrome
As Maria Kourounis notes on her website, many parents experience feelings associated with their children’s growing independence. Empty nest syndrome is the grief and loneliness parents may feel when their children leave home, such as to live on their own or attend college. Additionally, many parents juggle dual responsibilities, caring for both children and aging parents. In a society that values responsibility, stress and exhaustion are common among caregivers, and it’s easy to lose oneself in the process.
As children grow up, parents may feel sadness or even dread about the prospect of their kids moving out. When a child struggles outside the family home or fails to achieve desired milestones, parents may experience worry or guilt, leading to family misunderstandings.
Kourounis emphasizes the importance of recognizing others’ emotions to avoid causing discomfort through one’s own needs or selfish tendencies. Each person must undergo a period of separation during which they learn to meet their social, emotional, financial, and physical needs independently, without relying on parental support. Failing to reach this stage can make it difficult to adjust to adult responsibilities.
Kourounis suggests these steps for parents to manage stress:
- Farewell with Sadness: Children bring purpose to life, so when they leave, parents may feel anxiety, loss, or sadness. It’s essential to allow yourself to feel these emotions.
- Acknowledge Feelings: Recognize and discuss your sadness with a friend or loved one. Writing down thoughts and fears can help release even the most haunting ideas.
- New Beginnings: This is a wonderful time to pursue dreams that previously lacked time. It’s also a great opportunity for self-discovery and deepening relationships with your spouse.
- Nurture Relationships: Since children may visit only during holidays, parents should reconsider their behavior to ensure these moments together are genuinely enjoyable.
- Seek Support: If you struggle to adjust to new circumstances, consider seeking help from a qualified professional.
Parents may also face anxiety related to their own aging. Accepting that loved ones may eventually pass, especially when they are ill or losing their abilities, can be a difficult process. Psychotherapists, using data-backed counseling techniques and personal experience as parents or caregivers, can offer tools to manage such stress effectively.
Anxiety Around Growing Up
According to 2021 statistics, 33% of American adults aged 18 to 34 live in their parental homes. While some may feel anxious about not leaving sooner, the other 67% face different challenges as they navigate adulthood. Growing up means exploring life through trial and error.
Maria Kourounis offers these tips for young adults:
- Respect Yourself: Understand and fulfill your deepest desires and needs.
- Follow Passion and Curiosity: You don’t need to immediately find a life’s purpose through rational planning. Listening to your heart and following your interests can prevent being stuck in a job you don’t love.
- Find Your People: Many people your age also feel lonely, so lean on each other for support.
- Remember Anxiety is Normal: